dear karma

Dear Mr. or Ms. Karma,

I would like to make a further inquiry as to our original contract as signed on March 15, 1986.

I would like to propose that you re-evaluate my current standing. As I understand it, "What comes around" is eventually supposed to "go around". While I do not consider myself an exemplary citizen by any means, I fail to understand the constructiveness of my current situation.

I've bought lunch for random homeless people when I did not have the money myself. I once had coffee with a hobo at a Greyhound station. I've tutored for free. I have a college degree in ass wiping and diaper changing. I've tried to approach every situation with the most open sort of mind that I could.

Perhaps you are trying to do this in a reverse method, whereby you give me the crap first and the good after that. However, I would really appreciate a response at your earliest convenience.

Sincerely,

Jennifer L. Loos