Mole Watch '08 Ends, Wisdom Teeth Take Over: The Terrible 22's?

Mole Watch '08 officially ended at approximately 10:00 p.m. Saturday night, when the tiny loop of "surgical" thread was discovered on my belly whilst changing into my jammies at my friend's house. The mole offered no parting sentiments, and did not write a note of thanks for its many years of habitation on my body. All that remains is a minuscule pink bump.

However, my body, unhappy with recent proceedings, decided that SOMETHING had to be done... after all, now the ratio of flaws to normalcy was completely askew. So approximately midnight, my teeth started hurting something terrible. The pain was in the lower teeth at the very back, and kept me up most of the night with its dull radiating. Awesome, says I. Approximately 5:30, I get up to get some Tylenol, hoping perhaps that will fix it. "How can I have MORE cavities?," I wonder to no one in particular, "When most of my teeth are already made of filling stuff?". (What is that stuff, anyway?). Anyway, I accept that I have been far too lax on my toothcare (despite my battery operated Tigger toothbrush), and vow to brush 5,000 more times a day if the pain will just cease.

Long story short, I end up at the most despised person in the world's workplace: the dentist. No fault of his own, he is a very nice man and all - but nobody LIKES going to the dentist. I tell him what's going on and he takes a look. "Not cavities," he reports. Then he says it... "but this wisdom tooth will have to be extracted."

"Extracted" is the nice dentist word for "yanked out of your mouth". "Oh," says I, "I don't have money for that. If that's all it is, I guess I'll just live with it." "I really advise you to get it out," paraphrases he, for I cannot remember exactly what he said, but it was something like that, "it is going to keep causing you pain."

There's that pain guy again. He and I do not get along well. Also, because I do not have a health plan, I will be going to the University dental clinic, where a bright young student will get the responsibility of yanking the aforementioned tooth from the aforementioned mouth. Awesome.

So apparently I am teething. Welcome to the terrible 22's.