New Year

I brought in the New Year in ways I will never repeat again.

It was followed by three days of insane guilt eating, in which I forced myself to eat multiple cheeseburgers and a lot of pizza. And booze.

This was followed by three days of the worst gastrointestinal exploits ever.

Srsly. I have never been so sick in my life. Just today I have regained the ability to move without feeling like I will puke.

Karma, I have learned my lesson.

Please fix me.

I'll be good this year. I promise.